5.4

The radiologists slowly submerged me, my bare ankle exposed to all sorts of X and G rays, into the cold impersonal tubular device. I was told it would be loud (headphones were provided) and last about 20 minutes.

And it started off SHAKILY, making me wonder if I'd forgotten about some metal object in my pockets or titanium rod supporting my titanium rod...But after a few moments, I calmed down, tried to visualize some really good story twists, and almost fell asleep.

20 minutes later they told me I'd done good, and asked if I felt the earthquake. I said, "Is that what that was?" Then we had a laugh about the odds of a) being in the safest place possible for what was b) my first quake as a Los Angelino. I started getting "Are you OK?" texts, which would have been great, touching, comforting even...but my boss' plane was about to land, and that usually leads to a solid hour of me having to throw a fit without bossman being the recipient of any minutia of my sudden tyranny.

So down Sunset I drove, happy to have not been crushed inside a radioactive tube, unless of course, I'd emerged superhuman with the ability to calm billionaire Jewish tempers with just the sound of my voice. Go Sox.